Emotional Intelligence is a skill to read, understand and interpret one’s and others emotional signals. It has become very crucial in today’s environment due to technological advancement. 15 to 20 years ago, there was lot of interaction between people and most of them able to understand emotional signals but in today’s era, with emails, instant messaging, social networking, the interaction between people has reduced to a large extent. Common working executive spends more than 10 hours in front of devices be it, laptops, tablets or mobile which lead to decline in emotional intelligence.

To attain Success in career  there is  a dependencies on others, that is your immediate family members, close friends, colleagues, clients, relatives, acquaintances. If you able to develop good relationship and leverage some of them your probability of achieving your Goal is lot higher.

Let’s get deeper into emotional intelligence. the one who can think and analyze his emotions and respond appropriately as per situation is emotional intelligence.

Let me share my story. I used to get angry very quickly and show my emotions quickly by raising my voice and speaking in a aggressive tone. Of course there would be a trigger point which triggers my anger however if you are emotionally intelligent, your outcome is to solve the problem and by getting angry certainly you cannot solve it and in return you add tremendous stress to yourself.

I practiced a lot, now if I get to that point, I take a deep breath and start to think how to resolve the problem, and in most cases the outcomes were much more positive and least stressful. However it is not so easy to make the switch, it takes lot of patience, persistence and focus to make this simple switch the reason being, this is changing your behavior which you carried for many many years.

Here are some of the steps which can help you to overcome some of your behavioral blind spots.

1. Select only 1 skill at a time to improve like, Not to get hyper, show anger, get frustrated or improve negotiation skill, how to say No, when you don’t want to say Yes.
2. Make sure you choose the most important one for you which has the maximum impact in your life
3. Carefully define behaviour to change. This entails describing your current behaviour and writing a measurable goal to creat a vision of how you will behave once you have improved in this area.
4. Creat a plan to get to your goal.
5. Identify factors that will support and / or hinder your change.
6. Develop self monitoring systems to assess your progress.
7. Identify potential sources of additional training. experience and information.
8. Develop feedback systems.
9. Develop self-reward systems.
10. Develop time lines.

The best way to evaluate the relevancy and effectiveness of this program is to test it for yourself. Take one of the emotional intelligence skills you would like to improve, such as increasing your empathy or decreasing your impulsiveness. Go through each step and create a plan for enhancing that emotional competency. The key to learning new behavior is to create a realistic plan that allows you to make the desired changes in as painless a way as possible.

By engaging in small, achievable steps, allowing for accurate feedback and making appropriate adjustments,  you will achieve your ultimate goal and reach your highest potential

Rapidly reduce stress

When we’re under high levels of stress, rational thinking and decision making go out the window. Today the work has become highly competitive and requires multi tasking. Being able to manage stress in the moment is the key to resilience. This emotional intelligence skill helps you stay balanced, focused, and in control–no matter what challenges you face.

Stress busting: functioning well in the heat of the moment

Develop your stress busting skills by working through the following three steps:

Realize when you’re stressed – The first step to reducing stress is recognizing what stress feels like. Many of us spend so much time in an unbalanced state that we’ve forgotten what it feels like to be calm and relaxed. Identify your stress response – Everyone reacts differently to stress. Do you tend to space out and get depressed? Become angry and agitated? Freeze with anxiety? The best way to quickly calm yourself depends on your specific stress response. Discover the stress busting techniques that work for you –The best way to reduce stress quickly is through the senses: through sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch. But each person responds differently to sensory input, so you need to find things that are soothing to you.

For me, I can go and eat some good food to reduce my stress level, some people like to eat chocolate, ice cream.

FIRST and IMPORTANT Rule to De-stress is to NEVER EVER smoke or consume alcohol. Both will aggravate Stress later or lead to further depression.

Another best way works for me is to quickly take a deep breath and do a self-talk . I have two choice. Choice 1 – I can get angry/frustrated and be unhappy Choice – 2: I can be happy and excited.

Then I say to myself, I make a conscious choice to go with number 2 and be Happy about it.

Now by doing this, it does not mean the problem goes away or resolves by itself. but by doing this you are far more DE-stressed and you gain the confidence and ability to deal with the issue.

Again it takes lot of practice but this is a simple one to get started right away without any specific action plan.